thebeautyholder

Redefining YOUR Beauty…


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Lush Life? 🤔

Hey Loves,

How are you? How have you been doing? I wonder if you really answered that question or did you just read it in your mind and ignore it? Tell you what let’s make this a bit more interactive! I really wanna know how you’ve been doing and although this is a blog post it does not mean we can’t talk so…

  • Let me know how you are in the comments below! Write a word, sentence or paragraph!
  • Hit me on my social media all the links will be at the end of this post!
  • Go a step further and call or message me! If you’re a real OG then you have my contact details. *Hint- they are also on the contact me tab if you look hard enough!

You see, I do want to know how you are. I don’t always get comments on the posts although there are some people who comment religiously (shout out to you Glemz ❤ you dollface) and although I appreciate all of you who read my posts, I want us to get more interactive). You make this blog with me and you are every word I type and crazy though I have… it is you and me…and I thank you!

Sorry for the long intro but hey, it was how your girl was feeling and it had to be said!

With all the mayhem that is my life right now, I feel as though I have been neglecting my skin care.  If you check out some of my previous posts you will know that I am big on looking after skin. Now that I am in my 40s I have noticed that my face is a little drier than before and those dark circles, well they are still there. I have a general regime that I follow but I have been slacking so I will be setting myself a challenge and I want to challenge you too! There will be more on that on Wednesday this week so stay tuned!!

I recently visited LUSH handmade cosmetics for the first time. Yep, I normally just walk past the place but my homie Glemma dragged me inside and I thought I would give it a try! I picked up two products: LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL and OATFIX Fresh Face Mask! Both products Vegan 🌿 (so that’s a yes from me) and I am excited to give them a try and write an honest review on how my skin feels after using them! Will it be the Lush Life for me in the future? Can I get my skin back on track?

Let the Good Times Roll has popcorn (yep actual popped corn 🌽), maize flour, cinnamon and more!

Oatfix is for dry and sensitive skin with bananas and vanilla!

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Those are the basics for now and more to come when I do a full review! My main concern is trying not to eat it, to be honest! I kid! or am I? Do you use Lush products? Tell me more!!!

Background on skincare: Dry skin type / Exfoliate 3 times a week / I use a serum along with day, night and eye creams /  I also go to Clarins at least once every 2 months for a facial! I am not loyal to any brands but do not use products tested on animals.

New On Location with The Beauty Holder out tomorrow! See what I got up to at The International Women’s Peace Group event for International Women’s Day and also The Glamour Beauty Festival! Your girl has been busy!

So I look forward to hearing about you! 😊

Besos! 💋

TBH! xoxo

Twitter/ Instagram/ Snapchat: @thebeautyholder

Facebook/ YouTube: The Beauty Holder

 

 

 

 

 

 


10 Comments

I’m Back and Better!👌🏾

Hey Loves,

This first sentence has been written so many times and backspaced just as many. I mean how do I honestly start off this post considering I haven’t written one in so long! Actually, that is not all the way true. I have been blogging in my mind for the past 8 or so months; those thoughts have just not made their way out of the chambers in my mind. I guess some have broken free now and it feels good to say I’m back and I’m better! What does that even mean, though? Sounded good when Bryson Tiller’s dulcet tones sang it in ‘Don’t’ but in my world, it means more than I may be able to express right now.

I wanted to take a break from social media. I wanted to take some time for myself, to understand some of the things I was going through. I wanted some of my mental to catch up with my physical change. Yes, I intentionally chose the word wanted! I needed to look after my health, which was telling me I was a priority and not an afterthought. I wanted to look in the mirror and not pick myself apart because what I saw did not match up to what was ‘liked’ in the fickle beauty industry.

You see, no matter how confident we appear we all have inner battles that require us to reset our thinking so we can remind ourselves how AWESOME we are! Awesome AF! Rewiring some of my thinking has pushed me. Challenged me. Trained me. Strengthened me. Life has taken a series of interesting turns and I am grateful to God for seeing me through. Learning, evolving and continuing to focus on being the BEST me I can be… NO LIMITS!

So yes, your girl is back and better! Better in part also to many of you and your fantastic messages and love. Big thanks to those of you who got in touch telling me that you missed the blog. Missed me, and my small contribution in the form of this blog that does its own thing. Thank you for encouraging me and for sharing ways I have inspired you. Those that know me, know that I really love this blog and what it represents. The strange goings on from a chick that loves family, friends, Brooklyn, music, makeup Trey Songz and so much more! I have missed you all and pray that you are good and life is all it needs to be for you right now- especially in these trying times!

I’m gonna end by saying THANK YOU to everyone who voted for me in the Best Makeup Artist 💄 category at last year’s AFRO MODEL AWARDS! I don’t think I will ever get over the shock of winning. It was very soon after that night that I took time out. I put shout-outs on Twitter and Facebook but let me holla on here too. I am so grateful and blessed at the recognition and hope it raises your spirits and reminds you that you can do and be anything you want to. No matter your age or the stage you’re at in life! Your journey is in your hands!

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Wishing you all the love in the universe… see you in the next post!

Besos! 💋

TBH! xoxo

p.s. I know for some there are more questions and things you want to know. Not everything is for the blog and what is will be on the blog in due course!


5 Comments

So, I’m 40! Now what?!

Hey Loves,

I’m still on a blogging streak and I hope that you are enjoying the current posts populating your mailboxes. I know there have been through peaks and troughs with my blog but I am glad that you all have stuck with me. Please remember you can comment and share your thoughts on anything I post. I love interacting with you!

This is one of those posts I have been writing in my mind for a while. I don’t know why the thought of turning 40 brought about so much anxiety. Actually, I do know. It’s because for most of my life I have put unnecessary pressure on myself to have certain things done before 40 and not all of them have materialised. On my birthday,  I sat and thought…

So, you’re 40! Now what?!

So you’re not married, yet! So you haven’t had more children! You haven’t travelled the world and become the dancer you thought you would when you were little. You’ve been hurt by those closest to you. You’ve not got money like you once did. Blah, Blah and Blah once more. What I decided to say to all of that and the many other comments beating me with a stick over my head, was SO WHAT!!!

Yep! SO WHAT! I even said it to those people brave enough to comment on my life without knowing anything about me or my life. SO FREAKING WHAT!

It has taken me a while to admit it but I have had a wonderful life in many respects. It has not been without it’s ups and downs but I am grateful to reach the age of 40 and to have accomplished many of the things that I have done. I pretty much had my life planned out by 18 and expected to achieve certain milestones by 25, then 30, then 35 and 40 etc. What I have not done is acknowledge that even the smallest victories have shaped me. The toughest trials have moulded me and through God’s grace I have come out on top.

I have battled severe depression and self harming (which many may not know). I struggle with having a beautiful Son who is on the Autistic Spectrum and all that entails. I have had weight struggles for a large part of my life and have wanted to end my life. I have been betrayed by ‘friends’ and family. I am constantly judged. That is the shortened version. I say this to say that the life I had planned was not what God had planned. I now realise I had to go through this to become stronger and wiser.

So I am 40. I am a number older than I was last year and that number represents so much. It represents in part, my growth, my knowledge, my love and determination to continue to reach for the stars and beyond. To love hard and receive love in return. That my age doesn’t define me or my ability. It doesn’t define what others think of me or my life.

We have become so fixated with judging what we do not understand. If you haven’t lived it, how can you judge it? I may not have the level of success that you want me to have but it doesn’t mean that I do not have success. I may not be married but it doesn’t mean I do not have love or am in love. My Son may not speak but it doesn’t mean he can’t communicate his love in another way- which he does! 

Right now you may be going through something you don’t understand. It hurts and you want it to stop. IT WILL! You’re in a stage of metamorphosis. You are changing from your ‘caterpillar’ form to become the beautiful butterfly version of yourself that is stronger, wiser and more beautiful than you can currently imagine. Don’t give up on you. Don’t give up!

Enjoy life and your journey. Live your life and don’t let it live you. Make mistakes and learn from them. Don’t pressure yourself to react to what the world wants you to. Follow your heart and instinct…no one knows YOU like YOU!

I am blessed to have reached the beautiful butterfly age of 40. Many others have not been as fortunate and I refuse to let another day pass letting the past mistakes I have made hold me back from living a happier and healthier life. Age truly ain’t nothing but a number. A number that increases in health, wealth and strength!

Thank you for sharing this blog with me and on a more personal level some part of my 40 years. Here’s to many more for you and me!

If you are struggling with depression or self harming or anything else I have mentioned in this post. Don’t suffer in silence. Talk to someone you trust and let them help you. Here are some links you may find useful.

Help with depression: https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/a-to-z/d/depression

Autism: http://www.autism.org.uk/about/what-is/asd.aspx

Anxiety and Panic Attacks: http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/anxiety-and-panic-attacks/#.VrETtcdszEY

I also have a blog on finding confidence on your journey that has some tips if you are feeling anxious about things in your life. You can find out more here.

This post is dedicated to my pudding, Elle. I am always here for you. I love you! ❤ xoxo (p.s I have asked Elle if she is ok with me dedicating this blog to her).

Besos 💋

TBH! xoxo

 

 


4 Comments

The Truth on how I lost over 40kg in 8 months!

Hey Loves,

Guess who is back? Hope that you are all well and wonderful!

With all of my fashion related posts you can tell I am pretty excited about the major changes my body has been through. It is the question I am asked the most. What people are curious about the most.

So here it is… a little video on how I lost the weight in all its cinematic glory! Just kidding. It is just me filming on my laptop whilst balancing on my (dislocated) knee.

Hope you enjoy!

How I lost over 40kg in 8 months!

I miss you all!

Besos!

TBH! xoxo

 


6 Comments

DM does Dinner 🍴 | Baked Salmon with Garlic Courgetti!

Hey Everyone!

When I said that I am broadening my blog into a more lifestyle type blog it wasn’t lip service! I love that many of you want to know more about me and have loads of questions. There is a lot of interaction over on my twitter (come join in the fun @thebeautyholder ) page and so I wanted to bring it here too!

I have been a vegetarian for a little over 2 years and 4 months. Whilst I still eat fish at present, I am considering becoming Vegan. That will be for another post. In any case, I posted a pic of my dinner on Twitter and got a great response so I thought I would share it here.

Eating clean as a Vegetarian does not have to be boring! Courgetti is courgette spaghetti without the pasta! Check out my DM does Dinner series with this tasty treat!

Ingredients: 

  • Salmon Fillet or any fish of your choice (you can also use meat if you would like)
  • 2 Organic Courgettes (Zucchini)
  • Garlic, Dill, Cayenne Pepper, West Indian Green Seasoning, Coriander 
  • Extra Virgin Olive Oil (EVOO)

Additional veggies and ingredients are optional. Make it your own!

Specialist Tools:

  • Spiralizer (got mine from Amazon)

IMG_7903 Spralizer

Prep Time: 

Veggies – approx 3-5 mins

Courgettes spiralized

Fish– approx 10 mins (to clean and season)

Cooking Time:

Veggies- approx 8 mins

Fish – approx 25 mins (dependent on size and thickness of fillet)

How to…

  • Wash and prepare the vegetables using the spiralizer
  • Pre-heat oven to Gas Mark 6 for Salmon 
  • Clean and prep Salmon and season to taste
  • Bake Salmon in foil for 25 mins 
  • Heat frying pan and then add EVOO as well as garlic, dill and cayenne pepper
  • Use paper towel to soak up some of the water from the courgettes before tossing gently in the oil for approx 6 mins 
  • Add onions, carrots or any thing else
  • Break Salmon into bite size pieces and gently mix into courgetti 
  • Plate and enjoy!

This dish is not only quick and easy but tastes delicious and is a great way to incorporate veggies into a meal without them feeling like its a chore!

DM's Salmon and Garlic CourgettiPretty easy huh! Let me know what you think! Also if you try it!

Hope you enjoyed! Coming up next… another #CopMyCloset

Besos 💋

TBH! xoxo


2 Comments

Finding Confidence on YOUR journey…💬

Hey Loves,

I have seriously been receiving so much love regarding my lifestyle change and weight loss journey. Thank you so much for not only reading my story but also sharing it, commenting, liking etc. I didn’t expect it to be such a popular post but I greatly appreciate you taking your time to learn more about me.

This post has somewhat been spurred on by the feedback I have received. My attachment to the wrong foods was a mixture of things but mainly emotional. If I was sad, I ate. If I was upset, I ate. If I was happy to a certain degree, time to celebrate and therefore, I ate. All now past tense. I no longer find comfort in the wrong foods and this is how I did it.

  • Looking BACKWARDS means you can’t see FORWARDS! 

I could not undo all the years of poor eating choices and to keep dwelling on it meant I was not able to move forward. I know firsthand how easy it is to stay stagnant in the pond of self-pity. I made poor choices in the past and I was not about to continue to keep doing it. What has been done has been done. Now time to change it.

  • Raise yourself UP instead of pulling yourself DOWN!

I used to enjoy being negative about myself. It allowed me to have an excuse and I was comfortable with that. If I called myself FAT, UGLY, NASTY and all those horrible words then if someone else did it, it would not hurt as much. I’ve spoken about changing vocabulary in the past. It is so important and something that makes and instant difference. Appreciate how far you have come. Do not allow anyone around you to put you down or use words such as those above to describe you. Compliment yourself and celebrate achievements. I have said it before, big or small they are all YOU and they are all achievements you should be proud of.

  • Feel your EMOTIONS! DEAL with YOUR emotions!

If you have been emotionally attached to food then you are likely to be familiar with this cycle. You feel sad, so you eat (or you don’t eat- which is also another way to be emotionally affected) and eat some more. You overeat until the point that you feel better, then you instantly feel bad for eating so much and that makes you more upset, so you begin eating again. Break that cycle by dealing with the emotion. Many will say easier said than done, but not always. Look at the reason for the emotion. Then ask yourself what the food will do to remove that emotion or banish it or indeed correct it. What I will say is some emotions run deep and you may need additional assistance to help you deal with or support it but try not to use food as that assistance or any other substance for that matter. It can certainly make matters worse in the long run.

Please note: Speaking to a professional or seeking additional help is in no way a sign of weakness or something to be ashamed of. We can always use extra help and support and sometimes this helps us start a journey and give us the strength and determination to continue!

  • LOVE is ALL around you!

You feel alone and that no one understands you! You are in a room full of people yet you feel lonely. We often push those closest to us away as it is easier to build a wall and isolate yourself than to believe the positivity and love from others. I want you to embrace it. I want you to completely let it engulf you. Immerse yourself in all the goodness and love that is being shown to you. Trust that your family and friends and those who truly know and want the best for you REALLY do want the best for your. Accept compliments with a smile and thank you rather than shooting them down with disbelief. Shower yourself with love. Positive quotes, Bible verses and powerful words of encouragements. Read something first thing in the morning before you leave bed ready to attack the day with a happy heart. Do the same before bed. Pray, meditate, chant and be ready for the goodness that will come to you.

  • Stave off Negativity!

Walk away from it, ignore it and do not let it suck your positivity. It has no place in your life.

  • It has to be YOU!

How often do you actually spend with yourself? Truthfully! Sitting alone in the room checking your phone whilst catching up with your iPad doesn’t really count. Shut down the technology, close the door, light some candles and breathe. Really breathe all the way from deep in your stomach. Tune out everything and everyone. Even if you can only manage 5 mins to begin with, you will be surprised at how much this brings to your life if you find time for you everyday. You can even do it with the family or friends as long as everyone is agreed on how important it is. Just remember you are tuning into YOU!

Believe me when I say that I still have to dig deep for the inner strength at times. It is not always easy but it is achievable My lifestyle change is focused around food and so some of the above where more specific to that. This does not mean that you cannot transfer them to your journey or take elements out to support you on your way.

If you would like to know more about some of the techniques I use on my journey or foods that make me happy or simply anything else, please don’t hesitate to get in touch. I am with you all the way!

Hope you enjoyed this post! Thank you…for all the love.

SMILE, LAUGH AND LOVE MORE!

Smile more… the beauty holder

Besos! 💋

TBH! xoxo


17 Comments

#TransformationTuesday | My Lifestyle Change! 💭

Hey Everyone,

Thanks for joining me. I have been getting requests lately of a more personal nature. Lifestyle, wellbeing etc. Ideally the main focus of my blog has always been beauty and makeup. That being said, the more personal posts prove extremely popular and I guess provides a little more insight into my life as Donna-Marie and not simply, The Beauty Holder!

I will endeavour to share some more of my world with you and broaden my blog into more than just makeup. Thank you for wanting to know more. So here is one of those more personal posts. Let me start by saying that this is a ‘personal’ journey. It is unique to me. Whilst I am not the first (nor will I be the last ) person to embark on a lifestyle change it is important to note that this is how I am doing it. It is not to pass judgement and I can only hope that if nothing else, anyone who needs it is encouraged.

On the 10th November 2014, I took the first steps to changing my lifestyle specifically related to food, health and emotional wellbeing. I talk of a journey and that is how I see it. I was finally ready to stop making excuses and to change things I was unhappy about.

Why now?

Well here is the back story. The short version. A couple days before it was one of my closest friend’s birthday. In fact it was the same person who has been working with me on my fitness and eating. You’ll find out more about Aaron in a bit and the pivotal role he has played as a friend and Personal Trainer. I was trying to find something to wear to his party. Nothing in my closet fit. Nothing in the store fit. Considering I had returned from the US a couple months before with clothes in tow, I was shocked to look in the mirror and really look at myself. When I looked at myself, I didn’t recognise who was staring back at me. My first thought was food and wanting to eat the frustration away. The amount of times I tried to find an excuse to not go the party. I didn’t wanna go and embarrass my friend by looking a mess. That’s how I felt. It was not just the physical it was the emotional side.

Many of you do not know me at all. I can’t sit here and tell you that I have always have an issue with food or my weight as that would be untrue. I had been a slim girl for the majority of my life, all through school and beyond. Yep, even living Stateside and eating everything in sight did nothing to affect my shape. As with many women, it changed after I had my son. Thing is he is 12 years old now, so there is no throwing that up in the mix anymore.

Diddy DM

Why was I overweight? Honest sucks right so here is the ‘sucky’ (got that from LC in The Hills) part.

  1. Bad/ poor eating habits
  2. No exercise
  3. Emotional frustration/ unhappiness/ depression
  4. Laziness
  5. Purposely gaining weight

I honestly did not realise how quickly it crept up on me. The last point above was how I felt when I was really unhappy at things in my life and so I made a conscious effort to gain weight so as to become unattractive to people. Silly Rabbit, tricks really are for kids, as that DID NOT work.

Most of this extra weight has been with me for about 6-7 years. I have fluctuated due to what I thought were quick fixes such as living on shakes and less than 400 calories a day. True to form though the weight crept back on. There were times when I was ok with being a fuller figured chick. Most of the time I was not. For those who want stats, at my biggest (October 2014, I was a size 20\22). I am currently a 14 (some stores a 16). That is in UK size.

DM Then/ Now Then Now/ dm

I knew I was emotionally attached to food earlier on last year, around June.  I started to switch out some of my poor food choices and it was working. I then had a really bad experience at a hair salon (more on that in another post) and I lost it. Food was my comfort and I was back to old habits.

So what changed?

I was tired of the excuses. I was tired of the control food had on me and not the other way round. I was tired of cancelling on friends because I was embarrassed. One of the biggest catalysts was changing to be a better role model for my son. My son is a young person with Autism and diet is a huge part of affecting his behaviour. I not only needed to change for me but for him. This time I had to make it for real.

My amazing friend Aaron deserves every accolade I could award him for truly being there for me. I met him at my old workplace and we have become close friends. He became really passionate about Nutrition and Personal Training and we would talk about it and he would give me tips and hints. At the time I wasn’t ready. He never shoved it in my face but instead remained supportive. After his party we spoke and I told him I was ready to really change my lifestyle and I have not looked back since. Aaron is supportive but firm. He is honest and always at the end of the phone with all my ‘can I do this’ type queries and there are always loads. What for me means the most is that he has not changed how he is with me as a friend because of my size.

What does that mean though?

It means that I am a lot more aware of what I put into my body. I have cut out processed foods and sugar (apart from natural sugar such as fruit). I don’t drink sodas (I was knocking back at least 3 a day). I eat loads more vegetables and balance them with protein and the right carbs. I drink 3L of water a day and love it- apart from the many toilet breaks! I do not take any pills, or supplements, no dietary aids- nothing. This is all done the clean eating and exercise way. The one that people call old fashioned. I guess I am old fashioned then. As a Vegetarian I thought this would never work but it has in so many ways. I have to make this clear. I EAT! I EAT LOTS! I simply eat better! I started working out with A (Aaron) in December 2014 one day a week. We are still at one day a week but as of this week I am going on my own a couple of days. That was a major change as I am not the biggest fan of the ‘gym culture’. I was petrified going it alone today but to be fair no one even noticed me. Yay! It is tough and there are times I want to give up. There are no quick fixes, this is no joke.

The biggest obstacle I faced was myself. My confidence, my ability to believe that I was worth more than what I was doing to myself. That my Son is worth more. You see it is not simply about size but what is inside. Knowing my worth, which is something I happily preach about to my clients but not believing it when it came to me and my life. I want to be healthy. Thick- Healthy cause this girl got some curves and they ain’t going nowhere! It is that simple. This is not just be skinny Donna-Marie and life will be good, it is understanding and educating myself and my family. Knowing that food does not solve my problems and that exercise (not matter how small) can release those chemicals in the body to make you happy. When I feel emotionally drained or happy I don’t reach for food like I did before. As I understand and appreciate more of how to deal with those feelings.

One day at a time. I am a lot older now so my body doesn’t bounce back like before. Every step is an achievement and I celebrate the big with the small. This very precious thing called life is extremely fragile and I for one have taken it for granted for far too long. This is me today- as in literally today…still on my journey posing in the posh bathrooms at Brent Cross!

Me todayStill me today

I want to say a really BIG THANK YOU to Aaron for everything you have done. I would never have been able to get this far without you. I am not there yet but this journey has been made easier having you by my side. I hope everyone at the old workplace will see what I have always seen… someone who has the biggest heart and is all-round pretty AMAZEBALLS!

My fantastic family and friends who do not see size when they see me, you are EVERYTHING!

No matter what journey you are on, you are not alone. Sometimes we need a little support or word of encouragement. This is not about knocking what anyone else does. This works for me. Whatever you do, just do your research (if you’re on a fitness, eating journey). Your journey is YOUR JOURNEY. No-one can start that journey for you but you. You will know when you’re ready. Good Luck!

Hope you enjoyed this little bit of DM. If there is anything else you would like to know then please get in touch.

If you want to get in touch with Aaron, you can find him on Twitter @ManLikeAaron_ or Instagram @aaron_gram

Thank you for reading!

Have a happy and healthy week!

Besos! 💋

TBH! xoxo